Dies to Removal

Our plan is to set the whole world on fire. Of course we are super villains.

The cut vs Delver is more likely Flame Rift since that is a race we can easily lose to goyf. Deathrite is also a notable amount of lifegain but searing effects also help against them. I have no idea how he fights Dredge/Reanimator though.

I should be more specific. I meant UWR Delver, which I feel Flame Rift is good against since we need to kill them before they land a Batterskull. You may be correct with RUG Delver though.

So does that mean burn players are super villains?

If so, I am totally onboard

We're the best kind of super villains.

Once you have tapped all of your Islands, then, you have my permission to fry.

I've always thought of fire as neutral.

I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I set it on fire.

Look what I did to this game with a few lightning bolts and a couple of goblins.

Hmmm? You know... You know what I've noticed? Nobody panics when things go "according to plan." Even if the plan is horrifying!

If, tomorrow, I tell every magic player that, like,your opponent who is tapped out is still going to counter two of your spells, or like your opponent will kill you before you get to play a land, nobody panics, because it's all "part of the plan".

But when I say that I'm going to cast a bunch of 1cc Burn spells, well then everyone loses their minds!

Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It's fair!

I draw less than seven burn spells, you live.

If
you don't have lifegain, you die.

Now we're talking.

So does that mean burn players are super villains?

If so, I am totally onboard

We're the best kind of super villains.

Once you have tapped all of your Islands, then, you have my permission to fry.

Then you play choke

Boil, sir.

We only talk about red cards here.

Bar none the easiest thread to derail

You guys merely adopted the fire. I was born in it. Molded by it. I didn't feel the lightning until I had become a man.

Bar none the easiest thread to derail

We're a bunch of hasty, impulsive, Red Mages. Dafuq did you expect?

But choke is actually playable

Bar none the easiest thread to derail

We're a bunch of hasty, impulsive, Red Mages. Dafuq did you expect?

You don't want the answer to that

Choke is unplayable because it is green.

Bar none the easiest thread to derail

We're a bunch of hasty, impulsive, Red Mages. Dafuq did you expect?

You don't want the answer to that

It couldn't be anything worse than what Madding would spew out, amiright?

Choke is unplayable because it is green.

No that makes it infinitely more playable

LM is colorblind. He sees Green and Red cards as the same color.

Choke is unplayable because it is green.

No that makes it infinitely more playable

Green sucks. Red is better.

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADE...

Choke is unplayable because it is green.

No that makes it infinitely more playable

Green sucks. Red is better.

It makes the hair silky and smooth.

Stop looking at me, swan!

No, Colonel Sanders, you're wrong!

The price is wrong, bitch!

I think you've had enough. No. Now you've had enough. Bitch.

*walks away shadow boxing*

"I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast."

"Wait, you eat pieces of shit for breakfast?"

Yes, I assumed you meant RUG and maybe BUG. I consider UWR to be closer to a stoneblade variant.

BlakLanner, stop that, everyone was having a perfectly fine time quoting Adam Sandler movies and admiring our PSully Upper Deck rookie cards.

BlakLanner, don't stop. Nobody should quote Adam Sandler movies because all of them (except one) suck.

And that was the last we heard from Platypus. May he rest in pieces.

Don't worry Platypus, I have made a career out of not doing what Ham asks of me.

You may continue to quote the good movie, but I leave it as an exercise to figure out which one that is...

Good news, everyone. Arts and crafts time has been extended by FOUR hour today!

This is handmade quality shit we're talking here.

My fingers hurt

You may continue to quote the good movie, but I leave it as an exercise to figure out which one that is...

It's Click, isn't it?

Ok, so here are my notes from the tournament:

I saw (Sorry if names are wrong):

5x UWR Stoneblade
1x Junk Stoneblade
1x BW Stoneblade
3x U/X Merfolk
1x RUG Delver
1x BUG Delver
1x Goblins
1x Affinity
1x High Tide
1x UB Reanimator
1x Mono Black Depths Combo
1x UR Sneak and Show
1x GB Dredge
1x URB Storm
1x Mono Black Pox
1x Mono Blue Counter Balance
1x UWR Miracles

I played:

Round 1: Merfolk

Lose Game 1 because I have all lava spikes and no way to interact with his jitte. I also flooded to six.

Lose Game 2 Because he had 3x True Name Nemesis and counters for both my smash to smithereens that were pointed at his jitte.

0-1-0

Round 2: RUG Delver

He flooded G1, and screwed
G2. I had T4 kill G1, T3 G2.

1-1-0

Round 3: Junk Stoneblade

G1 he keeps a slow hand and I have a T4 kill.

G2 I have 2x Vortex. He abrupt decays one and I play the second. We race burn vs goyfs on a shortened clock. He tries to swords his goyf in response to my last burn spell, but uh... there's a vortex in play. I end the game at 5 life.

2-1-0

Round 4: UWR Stoneblade

Lose Game 1. Not enough creature kill and Mystic puts the T3 Batterskull into play.

Win Game 2 because he had a slow hand and stuck on mana.

Lose game three because no answer to stoneforge and smash to smithereens gets countered twice and sulfuric vortex gets force of will'd. .

2-2-0

Round 5: Merfolk

Lose Game 1
because he has six counterspells and just counters everything while I mana screw and he beats down with jitte equipped TNN.

Win game 2 on a mull to six because his keep was greedy and his hand never developed.

Win Game 3 off GG > KM > KM> burn. He didn't find his jitte.

3-2-0 for 9th.

Sorry it too me so long to write these.

Guess what? Your back's gonna hurt. Cuz you just pulled landscaping duty.

You may continue to quote the good movie, but I leave it as an exercise to figure out which one that is...

It's Click, isn't it?

That movie was such a downer. It was like, sad and shit.

You may continue to quote the good movie, but I leave it as an exercise to figure out which one that is...

It's Click, isn't it?

Nope.

Dammit, Keith. You spammed our Sandler thread with your Magic stuff!

You got your peanut butter in my chocolate!


Hi, I'm officer Reeses. *blam*

And I like Vicky Valencourt. And she showed me her boobies and I liked those too!

I like Vickie Vallencourt and she showed me her boobies and I like them too!

Dafuq KS, ninja'd.