[Fedoras of Salvation] - White Knights ITT

[Lightning_Dolt]

There are no decks I enjoy in modern, and the disparity in power level between the established decks and homebrews makes it pointless. Modern is solved and there really isn't room to explore. I'm not complaining, just trying to be rational.

I think at this point it makes sense to walk away from competitive. It was a long time coming.

[Khaospawn]

Modern isn't solved. #triggered

[Purp]

Sold all my standard stuff today, except mono red/atarka red, finished my modern burn deck (except for guides, waiting until they get reprinted), and came out with $200.

[Lightning_Dolt]

I believe it is. The same decks consistently win and it's because the power level of their cards is the highest they can be without getting banned.

[Jamie]

Go buy your car and play hearthstone

[Lightning_Dolt]

I do not enjoy modern burn. Everyone is playing it, so you're playing a mirror (which is a goddamned coin flip) or a deck that has 15 hate cards in the board lol.

[Lightning_Dolt]

Go buy your car and play hearthstone

Never really got into Hearthstone.

[Khaospawn]

LD, play in GP Toronto and ship me that mat, son!

[BlakLanner]

We are in the same boat, LD. Unless I day 2 the Cleveland Open and therefore get my invite to the Invitational, that will be my last tournament for a long while. My failures over the last few months have shattered what little sense of self worth I had. I will likely offload a lot of my stuff there and just keep my Modern and Legacy staples.

[Khaospawn]

I do not enjoy modern burn. Everyone is playing it, so you're playing a mirror (which is a goddamned coin flip) or a deck that has 15 hate cards in the board lol.

I have much to teach you, young one.

[Khaospawn]

You guys are disappoonting me. Instead of playing Magic, enjoying yourselves, and taking it ONE GAME AT A TIME, ya'll are just focused on the end result. Of course you guys are discouraged when you only look forward to "getting there." Because when you don't, you just take all the negatives home with you rather than look at everything that DID go right.

[Khaospawn]

Thanks, autocorrect, for giving me the word disappoonting.

[Khaospawn]

My failures over the last few months have shattered what little sense of self worth I had.

Dude. Really? REALLY?

[Khaospawn]

I just don't understand the tilt some people have. I just don't.

[hamfactorial]

It's betas all the way down

[BlakLanner]

My failures over the last few months have shattered what little sense of self worth I had.

Dude. Really? REALLY?

Yes, really. It was the only positive thing left in my life. I have only worked 12 months in the last 36. I get laid off so often that I don't bother keeping anything personal at my workstation. The best I can do now is a shitty, underpaying, part time gig in my field. I am stuck taking care of a thankless, delusional mother because she can't live alone and managed care is too expensive. Most of my family hates me. My brother tried to have me involuntarily held at a county mental facility. I have no social life outside of gaming. I haven't had a girlfriend in years and am not in a position to find one any time soon. I have next to no friends and am miserable nearly every waking moment. Any self worth I may feel is only due to whatever successes I have had and, lately, they have been very few indeed. Quite frankly I don't know how I manage to keep going any more.

[Lightning_Dolt]

I'm working six days a week, ten hours a day, and this sums the situation up perfectly: http://cardboard-crack.com/post/1093745 ... ticipation

I think I just need to become a budgcaj, care about the game less, play less and stick to formats that I still enjoy (EDH and Cube).

[hamfactorial]

Jesus! Do you lift? Not trying to fuck with you, it helps stabilize my mood far better than tilt-inducing Magic games.

[Lightning_Dolt]

My failures over the last few months have shattered what little sense of self worth I had.

Dude. Really? REALLY?

Yes, really. It was the only positive thing left in my life. I have only worked 12 months in the last 36. I get laid off so often that I don't bother keeping anything personal at my workstation. The best I can do now is a shitty, underpaying, part time gig in my field. I am stuck taking care of a thankless, delusional mother because she can't live alone and managed care is too expensive. Most of my family hates me. My brother tried to have me involuntarily held at a county mental facility. I have no social life outside of gaming. I haven't had a girlfriend in years and am not in a position to find one any time soon. I have next to no friends and am miserable nearly every waking moment. Any self worth I may feel is only due to whatever successes I have had and, lately, they have been very few indeed. Quite frankly I don't know how I manage to keep going any more.

I feel you bro. Very similar situation. For people like you and I though, Magic is just a distraction that keeps us from facing things and working on their lives though.

[Khaospawn]

Well, fuck, i didn't know that.

Why didn't you tell us this sooner??


And with that said, I'm your friend. Albeit, an internet friend, but a friend nonetheless. And you're my friend. If you need to talk, I'm here, bro.

Just remember, though, MTG is just a game.

[Lightning_Dolt]

Jesus! Do you lift? Not trying to fuck with you, it helps stabilize my mood far better than tilt-inducing Magic games.

I was a little tilty earlier, but this is a cool, calculated and sober thought process now.

I do not lift, no, but I do a very physical job for 10 hours a day, 6 days a week and do Kung Fu three night a week.

[Khaospawn]

Like Ham said, start exercising. It HELPS. Please, start making some life changes. Your happiness and well being is a LOT more important than winning at Magic.

[hamfactorial]

We can help, if you like.

[Jack]

Somehow, I'm drink off of three glasses of wine right now

[Purp]

You guys are too results oriented. You both have said you don't have Time to devote to magic,(standard requires anlot of investment mentally )which what you have to do be successful, yall need to take a step back and come back to the game when it becomes about having fun.

[Jack]

Oh wait. Shit. I barely ate anything today or yesterday

[BlakLanner]

Jesus! Do you lift? Not trying to fuck with you, it helps stabilize my mood far better than tilt-inducing Magic games.

I joined a gym about two months ago. While my physical strength has gone up, it has not helped my mood at all. On top of that, it actually hurts to go now since I have what I think is a damaged nerve in my back that causes alternating pain and numbness in my left arm. I woke up with it one morning after finding myself sleeping in an awkward position contorted around one of my cats (those of you with cats will understand). I need to get it looked at but am in that wonderful grey area where I make too much to get assistance for medical insurance and have to pay the penalties, yet don't make nearly enough to actually afford an extra $300 per month expense for minimal coverage.

Well, fuck, i didn't know that.
Why didn't you tell us this sooner??
And with that said, I'm your friend. Albeit, an internet friend, but a friend nonetheless. And you're my friend. If you need to talk, I'm here, bro.
Just remember, though, MTG is just a game.

I have always believed that my problems were for me to bear alone, not to load onto other people who have their own issues with which they must deal. I just have finally run out of sources from which to draw strength and have begun to truly fall apart.

I feel you bro. Very similar situation. For people like you and I though, Magic is just a distraction that keeps us from facing things and working on their lives though.

It was more than that for me. It was one of the few things I looked forward to. When I was playing well, it was a great mood lifter. It was a source of strength when I ran out of others. There was also the very slim chance that I could spike one of these tournaments and lessen my financial burdens, so it gave me a much needed sliver of hope as well. I do what I can to improve my position in life but unfortunately there really isn't much I can do right now but wait for an opportunity and try to seize it.

[Jack]

This is certainly interesting. I've never been drunk off of just wine before.

[Mcdonalds]

Jesus! Do you lift? Not trying to fuck with you, it helps stabilize my mood far better than tilt-inducing Magic games.

I joined a gym about two months ago. While my physical strength has gone up, it has not helped my mood at all. On top of that, it actually hurts to go now since I have what I think is a damaged nerve in my back that causes alternating pain and numbness in my left arm. I woke up with it one morning after finding myself sleeping in an awkward position contorted around one of my cats (those of you with cats will understand). I need to get it looked at but am in that wonderful grey area where I make too much to get assistance for medical insurance and have to pay the penalties, yet don't make nearly enough to actually afford an extra $300 per month expense for minimal coverage.

You may wish to look into medical marijuana, iirc New York has laws regarding that, although I dunno the specifics, if you are adverse to smoking it, Vaporizers/Edibles both are options (and are much more effective, although they take a bit longer to feel the effects), Brother had a slipped disk (in fact, the pain he mentioned was similar to yours, pain/numbness and he said it was difficult to squeeze his pinky and thumb together without much pain), and seemed to help.

That won't fix it, but may make your life a bit more bearable

[Khaospawn]

You guys are too results oriented. You both have said you don't have Time to devote to magic,(standard requires anlot of investment mentally )which what you have to do be successful, yall need to take a step back and come back to the game when it becomes about having fun.

Thank you, Purp. You said exactly what I wanted to say, especially since the 3 Chocolate Peanut Beer stouts I consumed would've had me rambling all over the damn place and losing the point.

[Khaospawn]

Jesus! Do you lift? Not trying to fuck with you, it helps stabilize my mood far better than tilt-inducing Magic games.

Well, fuck, i didn't know that.
Why didn't you tell us this sooner??
And with that said, I'm your friend. Albeit, an internet friend, but a friend nonetheless. And you're my friend. If you need to talk, I'm here, bro.
Just remember, though, MTG is just a game.

I have always believed that my problems were for me to bear alone, not to load onto other people who have their own issues with which they must deal. I just have finally run out of sources from which to draw strength and have begun to truly fall apart.

Well, the three hardest things for anyone to say is "I love you", "I'm sorry", and "I need help." I've been guilty of all three numerous times. And with that said, I can't fault you for not wanting to share this.

It's far too easy for us to slide into "DTR" mode where we're all too scared (or just don't have time to play back) of being trolled when we disclose personal things. I've noticed this a lot in the last year.

Look man, these problems aren't all for you to bear. I get the whole "I'm a man thing and have my own, sole struggle to deal with." If some shit is going down in your life, you need to talk about it. If not with us, then somebody. Otherwise it just eats you upside, infecting everything you love, including Magic.

We want you to be strong. We want you to be better than you were yesterday, both in life and in Magic. Whatever you need from us, just ask. Or at least, let us in so that you don't have to deal with this on your own. We got you, man.

[Lightning_Dolt]

LD, play in GP Toronto and ship me that mat, son!

It's so ugly...

[Khaospawn]

Keith, are you high? Have you seen it!?

[Lightning_Dolt]

Both the Toronto ones are horrid imo.

[Khaospawn]

Have you seen my playmat!??



I won it some some shit tournament years ago. Wanna know why I've disregarded every mat I come across since winning it (aside from the 2013 Nicol Bolas Game Day Champion mat)? These reasons:

1) It's hideous. Look at it. It's fucking ugly.

2) Nobody else would dare play on it. Somebody having the same mat as you is just so awkward.

3) It's freakishly small. FFS, it's only 2/3 the size of a normal mat! And sometimes smaller than that compared to SCG mats!. It's pretty easy to roll up and I hate carrying extra shit around at tournaments.

4) I don't care if it gets dirty. Shit, I've spilled beer, drugs, and bodily fluids on it and you'll never notice (because it's hideously dark!)

5) It's me. Warts and all.





So of-fucking-course, I want the Toronto mat. Pretty please. With a fucking cherry on top. Get me that mat.

[Khaospawn]

Ugly mats are had to come by!

[Khaospawn]

Well, TRULY ugly mats.

[Jamie]

BlakLanner that was an impressive post. Depression/low self worth, not doing well at mtg, and even a cardboard crack reference. What a true dtr post.

[BlakLanner]

You may wish to look into medical marijuana, iirc New York has laws regarding that, although I dunno the specifics, if you are adverse to smoking it, Vaporizers/Edibles both are options (and are much more effective, although they take a bit longer to feel the effects), Brother had a slipped disk (in fact, the pain he mentioned was similar to yours, pain/numbness and he said it was difficult to squeeze his pinky and thumb together without much pain), and seemed to help.

That won't fix it, but may make your life a bit more bearable

The smell of the stuff makes me nauseous. Besides, those laws are still in their infancy and they haven't even approved any growers yet, much less let people start prescribing. The pain isn't nearly as bad as you are describing by default, it just gets a lot worse when I lift or get stressed due to the tension in my body at those points.

[Jamie]

Also I sympathize with your situation